A Light in the Darkness - Part 43: A Light in the Shadows
by Mia Skywalker & Wataruo

PAIRING: Yamcha/Hakusai, Bulma/Vegeta
RATING: G
WARNINGS: angst
DISCLAIMER: Neither of us owns any of the DBZ characters or anything about DBZ, but we both wish we owned the Saiyans. All of them. At least all of the ones with hair. And yes, we're including Yamcha in that, now you know. These characters are owned by Toei, Viz, Akira Toriyama, and FUNimation, even though the last one is a crying shame. We do own what we've written here, and our specific storyline, just not Dragonball itself. We make no money off of any of these guys, nor off this fic. We just have fun writing it.
SUMMARY: Even more is learned about Yamcha's past. 
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT: Thanks to saiyengerl for beta'ing!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Last time on Dragonball Z: A Light in the Darkness....

Bulma and Vegeta learned about Yamcha's newly acquired characteristics, and they all learned more of his heritage.

"I thought that someday I might be able to return to Vegeta-sei. Oh, I know Vegeta exiled me, swearing that I would die if I ever returned. But I thought that I might be able to get past that. If I’d been a male, he would have had me killed for my insolence; because I was a female, he merely exiled me. Exile! As though that wasn’t as bad as death! To never see my family and comrades again! And now I know that I never can, no matter what. There is nothing to return to. It is gone; Frieza made certain of that.

"There, the boy looks at me and he smiles. A Saiyan child would never smile. I have allowed him to be weak, presuming that he would stay here forever, that he would never have the strength to be fully Saiyan. I know I was wrong, I suppose that I always assumed that leaving him someday would be easy. It is more difficult than I ever imagined. But leave him I must, and soon, or I will no longer recognize myself. And I am never going to return to the cave again. I have no home now, so this world must become my home, and I must forget everything about Vegeta-sei."

Tears were standing in Hakusai’s eyes when she stopped, and Bulma stared at her, tears streaming openly down her face as well. Yamcha looked like he wanted to cry but wasn’t going to. Bulma saw a strange look on Vegeta’s face, but wasn’t entirely sure what it was. Sympathy? Curiosity? Disgust? She couldn’t always tell what he was really feeling, since he usually covered everything with scowls and frowns.

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Is that the last entry? Or is there more?"

Hakusai pressed a button several times. "No, that’s the last of that entry, but there are several more after it. Do you want me to continue?"

Bulma looked at Yamcha, who nodded, despite his pallor.

"It looks like it was written several years after the last one. Two Saiyan years, so I guess that’s three human years." Hakusai pressed something on the pad and continued to read.

"Ah, I thought I was never returning, but these stupid ningen males...! If only they were like Saiyan males, and could control when a female got pregnant or not! But I don’t think, now, that I could ever return to a Saiyan male. Ningen males are gentler, but there is something in that gentleness now that draws me. I have become soft, I know.

"The brat I carry within me now, I will make certain that it is more ningen than the boy was. The boy was too strong; he will draw attention to himself, put himself into danger. I know he has already done so; I have sensed it.

"I miss the boy. I never thought it would happen, but I miss his smiles. He was the only light I had in this darkness of my heart, and I had to leave him. He was making me soft. But is it too late? Am I already too soft? Perhaps. I just know that I wish the boy were still with me, not out there on his own.

"I know the boy lives, for I have felt his ki. It has grown stronger over the years. He is still a child, but his ki grows. Someday it will be very powerful. That is when I fear for him, for it will draw enemies. Perhaps not as many, now that Vegeta-sei is gone, but perhaps more than he can handle.

"I will make this brat weaker, more ningen. I have learned more about the ningen in the past few years here, I can do a more thorough job this time.

"I wish the boy was here."

Hakusai blinked. "There’s another entry for the next day."

"Well, I do not carry one brat, I carry two! Damn that ningen male! I would kill him as I did the boy’s father, but now I know that ningen males do not control when females get pregnant, so I will not. I am becoming soft. I don’t want to kill him because... because of what? Have I grown fond of him? Perhaps, but that does not make me happy. I never intend to see him again regardless. Perhaps I just don’t care enough if he lives or dies. Perhaps I am just too weak to be considered a Saiyan any longer.

"I will modify these two to be more ningen. This task will be more difficult than if it were just one brat, more than twice as difficult. I will have to make certain I modify them both equally, so I don't weaken either of them too much, and I weaken both of them enough. I may not be able to do it, but I will try. I do not want my sons targeted by every enemy of Frieza and Vegeta-sei.

"I wish my boy were here. I wish I could go see him. I sense he is still not far from here. I've felt his ki moving about this past year; he's traveled around a little. But he always seems to come back to the desert. Is he hoping I'll come back for him again? I know I promised, but it was the only way to keep him from crying when I left.

"I can now admit that my heart broke when I left him here. Ah, I have grown soft! That a brat could reduce me to such tears! I will not allow these two brats to do this. I will not release such a destructive force as an untrained Saiyan child on the universe again, but nor will I leave two helpless babies to fend for themselves. I will find them homes, and then I will leave. I will not allow myself the weakness of emotional attachment with them, as I have with the boy."

Hakusai looked up, tears in her eyes. "There's one more entry, it looks like. Do you want me to read it?"

Yamcha nodded numbly. He was too much in shock to respond to any of this yet. He wasn't sure if he should cry or be angry. He wasn't sure what was worse, the fact that she'd abandoned him in the first place, or the heartbreak it had caused both of them.

Hakusai nodded and continued. "This one seems to be from...." She paused thoughtfully. "About sixteen of your Chikyuu years."

"The brats have been born. Not half an hour ago I gave birth to both squalling brats, then bathed and fed them. I refuse to look upon them further; I don't want to become attached to them. I have already found them homes, and I will take them to their parents after I finish this final entry.

"This is my final entry. I've decided that I can no longer stay on this planet. It has made me weak, made me want things that I cannot have. I need to leave, before I become so soft that I no longer recognize myself. It's already getting to that point, and I don't like it.

"I do wish I could see the boy again. It's amazing how much I miss him, even after all these years. It surprises me every day that the hurt never fades. I've managed to hold off on watching him too often, perhaps protecting him when he's in trouble, because that would be a dishonor to him. He was strong enough to survive so far; he'll be strong enough to continue to survive. I cannot protect him, and he doesn't need my protection. I am glad, although I am sad as well. I would really like to see him.

"Maybe someday he will find me, and I can tell him who I am. No, he would hate me for leaving him. He would never understand, no matter what I would tell him. Maybe someday I'll be strong enough, though, that I can understand him.

"For now, this is my final entry, I will leave these babies with their new parents, and then I will leave this planet forever. Yamcha, should you ever find this journal, know only that your mother loved you."

Hakusai took a deep breath and looked up. "I am so sorry, Yamcha," she said quietly, blinking slightly to get hold of her emotions. "At least she did love you."

Vegeta crossed his arms over his chest and looked back at Yamcha. ::So he is Saiyan as well. Now isn't that a surprise.:: What was more surprising was his own reaction to all of this. He found himself feeling somewhat sorry for Yamcha. Then he shook himself. Why should he care if his mother abandoned him? All Saiyan females did that. But the sympathetic look that Hakusai was giving Yamcha was making him slightly nauseous. "I think I am going to be sick," he announced before stomping outside. What Vegeta really wanted was to get hold of his emotions. There wasn't any way that he would let anyone besides Bulma see him being vulnerable. He turned and walked out of the lab, leaving the other three to stare after him speechless.

"Baka," Hakusai muttered under her breath. "At least there is some good about all this," she said smiling at Yamcha. "You have twin brothers."

Yamcha blinked, and then smiled like the sun was coming up. "Yeah, I guess it does!" He'd never had any family before, and now he had two brothers that he didn't know about! Then his face fell. "But we don't have any way to find them!"

Bulma gazed at him thoughtfully. "Well, maybe. It really depends. Wouldn't your mother have stored the results of what she'd done in her computer? Wouldn't it have the genetic code of all three of you? We could use that to find your brothers. I could create a detector, somewhat like my dragon radars. I'm sure I can come up with something like that."

"Could you?" he asked her eagerly.

She shrugged. "It depends if the data is in there. And I can't read Saiyan. That means that Hakusai will have to get the data out of there, and in a format I can read." She frowned, as it occurred to her that the only person that knew both written languages might be Vegeta. If he ever bothered to learn Japanese, and she wasn't entirely sure about that.

"Sure, no problem," Hakusai said. "It may take awhile to download all the data, then you'd have to be here as I read it all off for you to write down." Hakusai shrugged. "I'll need to set up camp here for a few days, just to make sure I didn't miss anything."

Bulma gave the Saiyan woman a sharp glance. "You're not serious!" When the other woman was uncomprehending, Bulma sighed. "Do you have ANY idea the complexity of DNA? We're going to need something that will translate automatically. That means I have to write a program based on both languages. And right now there's only one person that I know of that might read and write both languages. And he just walked outside. Excuse me a moment."

Bulma walked outside, and saw Vegeta standing in the harsh glare of the sun, apparently completely oblivious to the hot rays. Bulma squeezed her eyes shut, as her eyes adjusted to the bright light from the dimness of the cave. "Vegeta?" she queried as she approached. "Can I ask a favor of you? Did you ever take time to learn how to read our language?"

Vegeta had been leaning against the side of a rock, and when she walked outside he looked over at her. "Of course I did, woman. Why do you ask?" He wondered what she was up to as he studied her.

Bulma breathed a sigh of relief. The fact that someone knew both languages was definitely going to help. "I need your help, Vegeta. You're the only one that reads both languages. I need to write a program to translate from one language to the other, or all the data in those computers," she pointed to the cave, "is so much garbage. And I don't want to lose that knowledge. It may be all that's left of Vegeta-sei," she said, hoping it would give him incentive. "Will you help me? Please?" She gave him as appealing of a look as she possibly could, hoping it would sway him.

"You want me to be a translator?" Vegeta couldn't think of anything more boring to do. But when she looked at him like that, he found it extremely hard to say no. "Oh alright, woman. But you owe me," he said leaning forward to nip the end of her nose.

"Actually, no," she clarified. "I need you to simply do up something like the Rosetta stone, so we can translate it. It won't take you nearly so long." He narrowed his eyes at her, obviously not understanding the reference. "It's like you write up a chart that says what letter in Japanese is what letter in Saiyan. The languages are the same, so all we need is the alphabet. Once we have that, the computer will translate the rest." She looked at him thoughtfully. "I won't lie to you. It will take a while, but it won't take as long as translating all of those databanks!"

"Doesn't sound too bad." Vegeta slipped an arm around Bulma's waist. "When do you want it?" he asked leaning forward to nip her earlobe.

Bulma considered. "As soon as possible, of course. But I do want to get all of this equipment to Capsule Corp, if possible." She frowned. "It's in a good place, I suppose, where no one will get at it. But it would take me too long to come here every day to study the data. I'd rather bring the equipment home. I do have some empty capsules with me," she mused thoughtfully. "If we can make sure we get the computers free from where they are without damaging them, and can figure out how to get them back together again, so they work....."

Vegeta shrugged. "You'll think of something," he said watching her face. He was starting to feel a little neglected. But he really had no reason to be and he kicked himself for it. "Maybe Hakusai can think of something."

Bulma blinked at him, realizing suddenly why he was acting a little surly. She smiled at him, leaning against him. "Don't worry, Vegeta," she murmured seductively. "While you're translating for us, you'll need a LOT of attention from me, won't you?"

"You got that right," he grumbled, partially annoyed that Bulma knew what he was acting so grouchy about, and a little annoyed with himself that she could see it so easily. "Extra attention," he added.

Bulma smiled against his neck, and hugged him tightly. "Don't worry," she whispered against his skin. "You'll get it in spades."

"I had better," he said, pulling her tighter against his body. "I had better," he repeated his voice dropping to a low whisper.

~~~*~~~

Yamcha watched numbly as Bulma walked out the door. He still wasn't entirely sure what to think of everything that had happened. He didn't really remember his mother all that well. He remembered a woman that he'd adored, who had promised that she'd be back, and then had never returned. He'd assumed that she had been killed, and for years had sworn revenge, but had never found anyone to avenge her death on. Now he discovered that she was alive, but no longer on the planet. He wondered if he'd ever have a chance to see her again. He wondered if she'd be proud of him, or if she'd be ashamed.

Hakusai watched the expressions pass over Yamcha's face and sympathized. She speculated if maybe he would've been better off not knowing. But at least he realized that his mother did love him. Hakusai sighed and walked over to Yamcha. She reached up to touch his face gently and smiled at him. "Are you ok with all of this?" she asked quietly. "This is a lot to deal with in one day."

Yamcha looked down at her, surprised by her quiet sympathy. "Yeah, I guess so. I'm okay. It's just...." He blinked. "I have two brothers I never even knew about. They'd be sixteen now. I wonder what they're like?" he asked musingly.

"Oh," she said slipping her arms around his waist. "I imagine they are a lot like you." Hakusai smiled at him. "I imagine they will be as strong as you are and probably as good looking."

Yamcha blushed slightly at her comment. He knew he was good looking, but it surprised him that she told him that. Bulma had never commented on his looks. He suspected that she'd rather taken them for granted. He was beginning to realize that he and Bulma had both made a lot of mistakes in their relationship, and had taken far too much for granted. ::I'm not going to do that with Hakusai:: he thought to himself, unconsciously assuming that they were a couple. He smiled at her. "I'd like to meet them. I hope Bulma can help us figure out how to find them!"

"I am curious to see them as well." Hakusai started chuckling. "Goku was right - this planet is interesting. Maybe I should stay awhile." She sighed and released Yamcha, strolling over to a panel before punching the keys quickly. "Might as well get started. If I had known I'd be here a while I'd have brought a snack." She looked over at Yamcha and grinned at him. "Not to mention a bed." She looked around the lab, sneezed and added. "And a broom."

Yamcha looked at her in confusion. "I thought you hated the desert?" At her blank look, he continued. "If you hate it so much, why are we doing it here? Why not just bring the lab back with us to Capsule Corp? I'm sure that's what Bulma wants to do, anyway."

"Bring the lab back?" Hakusai blinked. "How are we going to get all this back? That would take forever. It's much simpler to do it here than lug all this equipment back. That could take days."

"Not if we put it in a capsule." When Hakusai continued to look at him blankly, he smiled. "You really don't get capsule technology, do you? You can shrink anything with it. They're usually numbered, based on what's put in them, but Bulma always keeps a few empty ones on her, just in case. They don't sell the empty ones, but they do have them. I'm sure she can fit this in a capsule."

"Really?" When Yamcha just smiled, she shook her head. "Well, I'll be damned. What are we waiting for then? Let's get moving! I am sure Goku is wondering where we went."

Yamcha looked sheepish. He'd forgotten all about Goku. He bet the Saiyan was worried about him. Then he blinked suddenly realizing that Goku wasn't the only Saiyan around anymore.... He looked down at his tail, which was wrapped firmly around his waist, then back at Hakusai. "Let's get Bulma. I wonder what's taking her so long?" The two of them went outside, interrupting the two lovers in a passionate kiss. Yamcha blushed in embarrassment, realizing what had been taking so long, after all.

Hakusai chuckled. "Don't look at me like that, Vegeta," she said to him as he glared at her. "We wanted to get going."

Vegeta snorted. "So leave," he snapped. "I am not stopping you."

"We sorta need Bulma for this," Hakusai said, not in the least bit intimidated by Vegeta's scowls. "Then I swear you can have her back."

::Isn't that cute?:: she thought to Yamcha. ::Newlyweds. Can't keep their hands to themselves::

Cute? Yamcha was startled at the thought. He'd never considered Vegeta 'cute', and he didn't think he ever would. "Uh... yeah. Whatever," he said, unaware that he was speaking aloud to Hakusai's telepathic thought, and it would make no sense to the other two. He looked at Bulma. "Did you want to take everything home with you? I was assuming so."

Bulma blinked. "Yes, actually, I was. I need Hakusai's help." She pulled free from the embrace with Vegeta, to his irritation. "I don't know how to remove these particular computers and make sure I'm not damaging them. We should also take note of how they're connected, so we can reconnect them later. I'm assuming you're familiar with the technology, so it should be easier for you." She walked back into the laboratory, expecting the others to follow again.

"It's a bit older, but I think I can figure it out," Hakusai said, following Bulma back into the lab. She stopped the program that she was running then quickly took several pieces of the equipment apart. As Hakusai continued to take things apart, she looked over her shoulder at Bulma. "I think we should only take the things we need for now, then come back and get the rest later. No one will bother it that's for sure."

At first Bulma was going to ask her why they didn't just take it all at once, and then she realized that the other woman might have difficulty remembering all of those connections. "All right," she agreed. "You'll know better than I would, about what parts need each other to run." She walked outside to find a large open space, and then threw an empty capsule with a large "BAM" sound. A huge storage space appeared before them, which the three Saiyans started to load up with equipment.

When they had completed it, Bulma re-encapsulated the container, and put it back in her capsule case. "Come on, let's go." The four of them took off, with Vegeta carrying Bulma again.

They arrived some time later with Vegeta getting there ahead of the others. Hakusai and Yamcha arrived a few minutes behind them. "You know I would think they were in a hurry," she quipped to Yamcha as they strolled to the door. "Looks like I have some work cut out for me this afternoon. First I get to put all that equipment together. Then I have to teach you how to behave yourself if you happen to go Oozaru."

"Oozaru?" Then he remembered when Goku had turned into a giant ape as a child, and realized that he would do the same, now that he had a tail. "Oh, I see." He looked a little depressed, realizing he would have some time by himself. "Well, I guess I'll practice that technique of Goku's for a little while. See how long it takes me to learn. Guess I'll see you later?" he asked hopefully.

"Yeah. This shouldn't take too long." Hakusai stepped forward and brushed her mouth across his. "Try not to blow anything up while Bulma and I tinker." She winked at him before she headed into Bulma's work shed.

Yamcha stared after her with a dazed expression on his face, as his hand unconsciously touched his lips where she'd kissed him. Suddenly he wanted to run after her and make love to her again. It felt like years since the last time, although it had only been since that morning. He could still feel her hot and rubbing against him, as he pressed her up against the wall.... He groaned, and turned away, determined to keep his mind off her. He spent the rest of the afternoon trying to practice Goku's technique out in a deserted area, but mostly just practicing different kinds of ki blasts, as he vented his physical release on blowing things up.

To be continued.....

~~~~~*~~~~~

And in the next exciting episode of DragonBall Z: A Light in the Darkness... Goku and Gohan learn about Yamcha. Some more lemon on the way as well.

So those of you that have read this far have finally learned the real reason we titled the epic as we did. No, we are not going to shove Yamcha aside as a minor character. Yamcha, Vegeta, Bulma and Hakusai are the focus of this epic. If you're not happy about that.... ::shrugs:: We're not going to change now. You're less than halfway through reading this, but we're already done writing it. 

The reason we post so slowly has to do with edits for continuity and consistency, more than anything else. We are very careful about contradicting ourselves or breaking our own continuity. We've probably still managed to do it a few times (we've written almost 400 pages with flush margins top/bottom/sides, single-spaced, 11 pt font), but we do try to prevent it. 

And yes, this means we've gone back and rewritten something if it contradicts something we did either earlier or later. But that also means we can't post quickly, because if we did, we can't go back and fix something if we mess up. We don't want that, and we're sure you don't want that, so....